Hello,
This week I’ve been struggling with the harrowing phrase, “Don’t take things so personally.”
Despite my best efforts, I most certainly take everything said and done against me personally. I no longer subscribe to the above saying, nor will I ever again. How can I, as a functioning and apperceptive being not? Tell me. Please give me a satisfactory answer of why, or even how to not take things in life “so personal.” Obviously, one can be wronged and perceive any action as an individually calculated attack on their person. Though modern sensibility instructs men and women to omit negative emotions from their inner chemistry and “turn the other cheek,” as Jesus supposedly said. But why? I ask you this. Are you not committing the greatest of disservices to yourself by denying each spontaneously deliberate offense? Are you not allotting mental space for nature’s most conscientious response to being human?
I am guilty of these trespasses, but forgive me not, for I have come to recognize the futility of my inner conflicts, and welcome my “sins.”
My adolescence was spent agonizing over whether my peers, friends, and family regarded me as an overly sensitive person, and it easily befell private chaos in my soul. This trait suppressed the real me for so many years and crippled the value I was entitled to feel from birth. It quite literally had a greater impact on my development than did all my loved ones combined. This brings me to the corporeal argument of this post.
Receiving and taking things personally in this life are two separate beasts. One feels powerful, authoritative, dynamic, and packed full of vigor. The other is a puny, feeble, decrepit, and epicene excuse of existential waste. But which is which? To take or receive? I’ll leave it up to you to decide.
So. Is there any benefit to taking things personally? Yes, there is. In fact, I argue that if you do not allow yourself to be personally offended, you are not experiencing human growth to its fullest potential. Personal offenses cultivate wisdom and predict how you as an individual will react in a myriad of stressful situations. If you know how, and by what you are offended, you are wickedly cogent. Once your sensitivities are accepted, they claim no hold on your actions. They become choices. And choice my friends is an omnipotent ally.
What vice can external evil grasp, once it is amicably sanctioned? Discern your sensitivities from your personality and watch malice adroitly unfold before your eyes.
Take this personally friends and family. I am certainly not advocating that you allow germinal emotion to dictate your actions and induce reckless violence. To deduce such a conclusion from this post would be vile. I am simply suggesting you at least try to gain footing in the complexity that is you. Respond naturally to calamity, and you will learn why misery loves company. It may not be what you’ve been led to believe.
Dan
Well said Son. Very good advice . Life is too short to live worrying about the little things that aggravate or upset us on a daily basis. If we allow this , it eventually consumes us and life become much more difficult than it really is. I’ve learned faith, family and forgiveness are three things I keep in my heart . I really enjoyed you post. Very inspirational.
One already knows that if a person starts their sentence with “ don’t take it personally “ they are in fact about to make it personal . So, do you flat out ignore what they are saying and tune them out ? Of course you should , and that is what Jesus meant by “turning the other cheek “ . In those day, men would fight to the death if they felt wronged by another man ..
I guess for me, it’s easier to just forget it and move forward . My perception of my self is not defined by anyone else and they will not make me feel like I should dwell on their words..